Author Archives: jcarey

galoshes

i’ve found that the fashion industry now refers to rubber boots as “rain boots” instead of galoshes.

either way, i’ve finally found my pair.

you may wonder why i’d need them in arizona, but i do garden a significant amount.

and it gets pretty muddy out there.

the best part about this pair is that they were on sale, then there was a store wide 40% off sale as well.

and they are even lined on the inside.

perfect.

another lesson in patience for me.

interview with erin

Erin and I met in high school. We were in some of the same classes; we also both hung around the drama room. (She was much more into the debate scene though). We shared many of the same friends, but I don’t think we actually became good friends until college. She ended up leaving the state, and returning to her southern roots to attend some random Oklahoma university. I still have no idea how she ended up back there-maybe that should’ve been an interview question, eh? We’d always make a point to hang out when she was in town, and she eventually moved back .  She hosts an annual party involving the Salt River and karaoke; she makes all her friends come and bring her presents. This year’s party was held at the most podunk bar I’ve ever been to. No really. When I walked in, there was an old man with no teeth trying to sing and dance with Erin.

JM: Could you tell us a little about yourself?

EM: I am sort of a non-interesting, interesting person….like I believe most of us are at heart. I am judgmental and curse like a sailor. I used to be a card-carrying member of the NRA as well as the ACLU. I reflect on the past far more than I ought to. I read every book I can get my hands on, as well as watch far too much television. I love political discourse but deplore name-calling. I think I am kind while being not at all selfless. I believe that civility is a lost art form that may never make it’s return. Assimilation has always made me fearful. I fall down a lot (literally and figuratively speaking). I would make a horrible crime scene detective but an awesome motivational speaker. I love the Counting Crows and hate Creed. I coulda been a contender….

JM: You love movies and television but also books. Talk to us about what draws you to both.

EM: I love a good story, even going back years and years to when I was a child. I like to hear stories. I often thought I would make a good biographer. I have a tendency to lose myself in fiction . I love the written word because when someone writes a story, most often, the author comes out in the pages, even if the book is a new subject matter that the author has never experienced. I love the investigation of people – whether it be the character or author — I love the nasty bits I feel like I wasn’t supposed to know, like I have uncovered a great secret that deliciously is mine to keep or tell. I also love reading a writer’s interpretation of emotion — easily the hardest thing to convey on the page. TV and movies are different…everything is in front of you, sometimes just a few feet from you on the screen. I become the voyeur.  This is a much more intimate place, watching the actors . The writing has to be succinct (unlike my ramblings), as the emotions and feelings aren’t described for the audience — this is why solid acting is key – it has to be believable. I have to immediately be invested in the outcome. In books I can imagine anyone I want to. On the screen it is already there. The page offers the starting point for imagination. The screen, if done correctly, allows you to be part of the drama. And, I love good drama.

JM: Are books always better than the movies?

EM: Oh God, yes! Well, no…well, most of the time. OK, yes, with the following notable exceptions:

– Fight Club – Book by Chuck Palahniuk

– Children of Men – Book by P.D. James

– Last of the Mohicans – James Fenimore Cooper

JM: Recommend one movie every adult should see.

EM: I hate this question. I have 25 movies that every person should see. But to name one? One? Ugh. I won’t give you my favorite movie as the answer (which is The English Patient) nor will I give you my favorite movies as a child/teen (Reality Bites, Dazed and Confused, and Pump up the Volume). I also won’t share my favorite TV shows of all time (Buffy the Vampire Slayer and The West Wing). Oh wait…i just did….oh well, deal with it. Here are 3 (sorry, best I could do).

– Way of the Gun – stylized, gritty, great story. Just a great film for everyone — who doesn’t love a little sex and violence and Violent Femmes, plus I don’t think most people have seen it, and I am always happy to have someone discover it.

– BBC Pride and Prejudice  — I am actually surprised at how many people have not seen this adaptation from the 90’s. Men, if you want to know what women want, watch this film, get a morning coat, and speak with a British accent.

– Lonesome Dove – this is the greatest mini-series of all time – back when mini-series were actually a “waited-for” event. It has everything and everyone in it, and I find it to be a good adaptation of the classic McMurtry novel. This will tear you up.

JM: Recommend one movie every child should see.

EM: Labyrinth – I think we all need to go back and watch a movie that has perfectly respectable CGI for its time, music that everyone loved, and an obscure love story — it’s like Glee, Avatar, and Harold and Maude all rolled into one, right? Perfect for your children. I am not kidding.

JM: you also love politics, tell us how a true third party would change things.  what would the ideal third party look like to you?

EM: Well, call me a pessimist, but I don’t think a third party would change very much. For a multi-party system to really work the current aim of politics (at least in the current state) would have to be redefined. We spend so much time berating and charging others with accusations based on their sound byte-belief system that we rarely discuss the problems of our society. We discuss hot-button issues that have replaced true ideals and passionate party politics. I am all for political parties. I really am. But the “issue of the day” is a product of 4th Estate. The free press has never been free — at least not in a mainstream way.

We all have our agendas. I don’t want your candidates in office so I will do whatever is necessary  to prevent that from happening. Even if it doesn’t work, i am going to do everything in my power to make sure you can’t get anything done once in office (no matter the office). i won’t try to find a way to work on the problems, I am just going to make sure that the problem of “you” goes away as soon as possible. This happens on both sides of mainstream politics, but also agenda/issue-based 3rd parties, no matter the size.

I think for a third party (or, a real multi-party system of actionable people who represent more than one thought and don’t run on the, “I am a former porn-star platform”) to be effective you have to start at the local level. that is where most of the actual work happens. There isn’t as much grandstanding or hands to shake. That is the place to penetrate with multi-parties, but, more importantly, multi-ideas. It isn’t “one size fits all” politics. Politics should be about the generation of ideas to better the community and respectfully debating the ideas and deciding whose ideas seem to better benefit the community. Then supporting each other, even while respectfully disagreeing with it.


JM: What is the 4th estate?

EM: The 4th estate is really any non-elected institution that has power or clout but isn’t really recognized as part of the political process — ie, the media, especially the 24hr news cycle that has made “hot issues” the main story, instead of a byproduct of the real issues. Sound byte edutainment from pseudo-experts who wear too much makeup (speaking about the men here) and rehearse their stories for greater impactful sighs and head nods. These are not my political teachers. These are not well-intentioned patriots. These people not only serve the lowest common denominator, they wallow in it. These are puppet masters…with too much makeup. I detest this type of greedia, er, I mean media.


JM: It’s interesting that you say all the actual work gets done at the local level because no matter who’s president, they seem to get blamed for all that goes wrong. I heard this idea on West Wing, but I kind of liked it: what about a Regent? Someone to be the face of the country while someone else is the President who does the work.
EM: I don’t know if a Regent would be much better in this celeb-u-tant society that has been created. Where did the Regent eat? Who is she sleeping with? Did she get fat? Is he gay? Is he bi? Does he have hair plugs? I keep having this picture of a Kardashian or a Snooki with a sceptor and cape. Shiver. I don’t know if a figure head is the right idea — I think the President, in a lot of ways, is already like that. A mouthpiece. So, the idea is to separate them…and in a perfect world it just may work. However, we then have an elected Regent — who kisses babies (not Snooki, gross) and acts as the glorified Supreme Wal-Mart greeter, and an elected President that does the work. We wouldn’t be able to leave him/her alone to work. We would start looking at them the same way…then the Regent would overstep their boundaries and attend a budget meeting and before you know it “GTL” is the national slogan of the US of A!!! OK, maybe not that extreme, but I don’t see how a separation of duties would really be beneficial. I don’t see American being able to really make that transition. Sigh.


JM: What if the regent was not an elected office but an appointment?

EM: Who appoints? The President? The Congress? It becomes a pissing contest of whose appointment goes through, like the Supreme Court. It is political, even if it is a baby-kissing position. My fear is who is behind the promoting of the appointment. What spin do they want? What is their endgame? Do we start on the role of palace intrigue by having a monarchy? I think not!

JM: Would you like to share an internet link?

EM: For all your bacon needs:

http://www.baconfreak.com/


I want to thank Erin for being an interview volunteer! You’d make her a very happy woman if you asked her a million questions in the comments below!

And by the way, here’s a link to her blog. Maybe the pressure will get her to blog more often!

coffee table before and after!

here’s my thrift store coffee table.

poor thing-needs some love! and when i say love, i mean spray paint! <3 wheeee!

here’s what i did…

first, she got a little loving…some light sanding to smooth out the bad nicks and rough edges.

then, i wiped her down with a damp cloth.

after that, she got her first coat of white primer.

followed by a coat or two of white semi-gloss.

(yes, you should prime. don’t argue. it really does turn out better.)

you may recall, that got us to this point. i asked if i should leave it white or paint it gold.

susan had a fantastic idea of GOLD DETAILS!!!! Heck yes!

so…stencil time! i went to the craft store to try to find something i liked, but craft stores still haven’t quite figured out that we are looking for something a bit more not lame.

so i decided to make my own stencil out of shelf liner. because it peels off easily. mostly.

at least it does when you really want it to stay lined to your shelf.

and let me just tell you, this whole ‘make your own stencil’ thing involves a lot more swear words than you think.

here’s some advice from one who went before…let the shelf paper uncurl.

iron the stuff if you have to because IT WILL CURL UP AND STICK TO ITSELF.

<end rant>

okay! grab a permanent marker, a sharp razor knife, and your paper.

draw your design…

cut out your design, peel that frakking backing off without getting it stuck to itself, and stick it to your project.

COVER EVERY SURFACE.

i also highly recommend gloves at this point, especially with the metallic spray paints.

and open the garage door. use a fan if you’ve got one.

spray paint.

peel off stencil.

once dry, spray or roll with a protective coat of a clear acrylic.

enjoy!

interview : sean

sean and i met when we were both seniors in high school. he was on my school’s campus for a debate tournament, and we were both walking in the courtyard at the same time. i happened to be wearing my renaissance garb (voted weirdest girl in my senior class-no idea how that happened), and he called out to me, “good day, my lady!” we talked briefly, discovered we were both going to be working at the arizona renaissance festival in the upcoming season, and we said we would see each other there. turns out, we also ended up living two floors apart the following year at arizona state university. we learned soon after that my good friend krys was also someone he went to music camp with and had lost touch with. sean was the first person i called when the premier of southpark played, we sat in shocked silence on the phone together until the commercial break, then i raced down to his dorm room to watch the rest of the show. i once asked him to proofread a paper for me, and when he returned it, he said, “i didn’t know you were smart!” can you believe we are still friends?!

i always enjoy our conversations, and i love visiting him wherever he lives!

JM: Could you tell us a little about yourself?

SH: It’s so interesting thinking back on the different ways I would answer that question based on time of life and experience.  Currently, I feel more than ever defined by my work and my family.  I am a Marriage and Family Therapist, working as an intern gathering hours for my license.  I work in a school based program as a classroom therapist for middle school age boys struggling with anger, abuse, depression and anxiety.  I am also a husband of 6 years, as well as a father of a 7 month old.  I also have a dog named Judah.  I currently reside in the Bay Area, though I was born and raised in Phoenix, Arizona.  My family is one of the founders of the state, settling in Wickenburg prior to the territory being voted into the union.  I moved to the Bay Area in 2001 to be close to my then girlfriend now wife.  We moved to Israel in 2005 where my wife began her studies at Hebrew Union College to become a Rabbi.  We then moved to Los Angeles in 2006, and have finally moved back to the Bay Area, hopefully forever. (I might retire to Hawaii, we’ll see…)


JM: I would consider you a proto-hipster; although you aren’t doing anything ironically. You are certainly not a hipster in the modern sense, but you always had a penchant for the gentlemanly arts. You were only one of two people who answered the phone with “Good Evening”-the other being my WWII veteran Polish grandfather. You wore a dapper hat, and you had a particular cadence to your speech. You played backgammon, and you were on a water polo team. Could you talk a little bit about your alternative lifestyle?

SH: All the men in my family have always held to a certain flair and style that I have always seen as what it meant to be a man.  For instance, my grandfather and father both wear pocket watches, as did I for many years.  My Uncle collects leatherbound books and fancy canes.  So having a sense of style that harkened back to a older period helped with individuation at a young age.  It also helped that I wasn’t really well liked in Middle School and High School from what I would determine to be the popular crowd, and gravitated towards Theater, Music, and Speech.  These areas of course were welcoming (for the most part) of individual expression or at least experimentation with expression.  These interests were where I found community, and they supported my eccentricities.

My father was a competitive backgammon player in college, among other things, and I learned the game from him.  My best friend Bob is very much into games and competitive gaming environments, and we both began to play with ernest in college as well.  I’ve broadened to other games, and use them in my therapeutic practice.  I also enjoy playing video games, for much the same reason I enjoy playing classic board games.  I enjoy learning a system, and exploiting it to overcome an obstacle or challenge.  Or Opponent.

So while my lifestyle feels a bit pedestrian nowadays (I just got done doing laundry, woohoo!) I suppose I’ve always given thought and meaning to my actions, be they a performance or calculating my impact on the world around me.

I’m also a nudist, weather permitting.


JM: Your father is a magician. As in a card-carrying, access to the Magic Castle magician. What was it like having such a cool dad?

SH: Birthday parties were Rad.  I would have my father invite his other magician friends over and have them all do magic for my friends.  Breathing fire in the backyard, chopping (almost) my hand off, all pretty cool (particularly for an October Birthday)  And the Magic Castle has to be one of the best clubs in Hollywood.


JM: You converted to Reformed Judaism from protestant Christianity. Could you explain to our lovely readers what it means to be Reformed?

SH: (Ed note:  It’s Reform, not Reformed.  We are constantly evolving our religious response to modern times, we never stopped.)

In Europe, about 200 years ago, a group of Jews wished to forgo continued rejection of the modern world, and work to incorporate and assimilate into modern society.  They became the reform movement.  They began praying and conducting services not in Hebrew, as was the custom, but in the native language (in this case, German)  The philosophy behind the reform movement is this:  Learn the Law (Hebrew Bible= Old Testament)  That which is meaningful to you, do.  That which is not, don’t.  Action without meaning is pointless.  Many can see this as an invitation to ignore all laws, but the challenge is to find meaning in our everyday actions, for then the holy and divine will be in our every movement and every uttering.


JM: Could you give one or two examples of “law” that you follow in which you find meaning?

SH: The Law of False Inquiry.  You are not allowed to enter a shop, and ask about many items value or price with no intention of purchasing anything.  The simple reason is that you could create the false hope of a large sale in someone, and then let them down emotionally.  This is evident if you follow more the golden rule path (Judaism places it as “That which is harmful to you, do not do onto others”)  That is always a big one, particularly to consider in a consumeristic culture.  Now I know that many of us shop in places with retail employees who don’t actually gain anything by us buying lots of stuff (in fact, some see it as more work and annoyance!)  But it’s a good rule of thumb anyway.  Some might also ask, “then I can’t ask about the price of something unless I want to buy it?”  The interpretation is no, you can, but be up front and honest with someone.  Say, “Hello.  I am not going to purchase anything today, but I had a few questions if you have the time.” this allows for a shopkeeper to tend to other paying customers while answering any questions you have.

I suppose the final one I’ll leave with is fasting.  I fast on Yom Kippur, the Jewish Day of Atonement.  From sundown to sundown I don’t eat or drink anything.  I do this to remind myself of my humanity (my own personal Gom Jabbar for the Dune fans out there)  As I try, for 24 hours, to abstain from all the instinctual drives my body is screaming at me to do; eat, drink, and sex.  The meaning is more of a personal find than one Judaism prescribes, but it fits the bill.  Had I not found my own meaning in this ritual, I would have given up fasting long ago.


JM: Would you like to share a web link?

SH: These look comfortable.  And my daughter seems to like them.

http://www.dancestore.com/pajama-mastercart/pjc-adultfootedpajamas.html

Thank you, Sean for being a willing participant in my ongoing interview series! Feel free to ask him any follow up questions in the comments!

beer cozy

sometimes you want your beer cold and your hands warm.

mostly in the winter.

summer is cold beer cold hands.

and sometimes it’s hot shower, cold beer.

but you don’t need a cozy then.

anyway…

knitted beer cozy

size 6 dpns

worsted weight yarn

cast on six sts; join in the round; place marker

1: k

2: *k1, yo repeat from * to end

3: k

4: *k2, yo repeat from * to end

5: k

6: *k3, yo repeat from * to end

7: k

8: *k4, yo repeat from * to end

continue to knit in stockinette for 2.5 inches from the beginning row.

next row, *k3, p2 repeat from * to end.

continue in pattern for 4 inches.

bind off purlwise.

weave in ends.